Saturday, April 18, 2015

Complete unfill

So this is what went down this past week:

Monday, I noticed that I was having more restriction than normal. I had trouble with cream of wheat at breakfast, and soup at lunch. I ate dinner without any issues. I chalked it up to my impending aunt flow visit. I stepped on the scale and it was exactly 349.0.

Tuesday, nothing stayed down. Hot tea didn't help. Water was a fail. Still not worried, it happens on occasion. I figured by dinner, I would be fine... But I wasn't. Went to bed, tired, hungry, and thirsty fighting a migraine the size if Texas.

Wednesday, I woke up with the migraine, plus my teeth hurt from clenching them against the pain. Every attempt to eat or drink was meet with resistance. I resorted to sliders just to get something Anything down. Ice cream, Powerade Zero... Nothing would go through. And now I have pain. Everything in came right back out.

Thursday, I hurt all over. My head was now the size is the entire continent of Europe. My stomach hurt from throwing up. I wasn't able to sleep because I was vomiting in my sleep... So I sat up on the couch all night with a bottle. I called my surgeon from work, and they couldn't see me until Friday unless I went to the ER. They told me to get 4 oz of fluid and hour... Which I did, but then it would come back up tinged with blood. I was worked in on the schedule for Friday.

Friday, I felt like death, but I had a conference for work that I had to go to. So I made myself shower and go... I ate ice chips and sipped Powerade Zero. I threw up twice. I didn't trust myself to drive, so the ELB drove me... Which I was OK with because I didn't want to go to the doctor alone.  I left at 10:30 to get to my surgeon. I had to wait two hours to be seen, every minute agony. I stepped on the scale and it said 332.8. I lost 16 lbs from dehydration, and my surgeon wanted to give me an IV. I just wanted to leave.

So now I am at home working on rehydration. Liquids and softs. Lots of water, but I really want a diet Pepsi loaded with ice. I had some mashed potatoes, but I'm afraid to try anything else.

Two months to keep myself on track, heal my stomach, and hopefully not regain a ton of weight. My insurance is changing, so I don't know if my new plan will provide any coverage for bariatric services.

Either way, I will deal with it as it comes.

Happy Saturday.

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Tight for no reason

I read LapBandGals blog about breaking her band. I had to laugh because I think that almost EVERY.SINGLE.DAY.

When I was taking the class leading up to getting Donny installed, another girl who was planning to get a band asked all kinds of ridiculous questions like: can you knock it lose with extreme physical activity? She was making a very thinly veiled reference to sex in order to see if she could embarass the older ladies who teach the classes. But we were assured that this could not happen.

Sometimes I wonder, though, especially after a high intensity Zumba workout with alot of jumping, if perhaps this can mess up your band? I know it's hard to eat sometimes after a workout... Even just drinking water is hard. But the next day is usually fine. Usually.

Anyways, today I'm struggling. I struggled yesterday. Not sure why I'm having massive restriction this week unless it's a combo of weather, allergies, and pending aunt flow. I PB'd everything all day long yesterday until dinner when I was able to eat and keep down food. This morning, even my 1/2 cup of coffee is having trouble. W.T.F.

I have an appt with my surgeon for my annual checkup on April 22, so fingers crossed this isn't anything serious.

Monday, March 30, 2015

Two steps forward....and one step back

Seriously, sometimes I don't understand my body.

I weighed this morning, and I was not happy with the number. Then I remembered that I am wearing way heavier clothes today than I was last week.... But I'm sure that there is still probably a gain in there. Not thinking about today being scale day, I wore corduroy pants with a sweater. Last week I wore lighter dress pants and a summer weight top. But I'm staying accountable, and I updated the ticker.

I've been slacking on my water drinking this past weekend, which might also have influenced the scale. Lesson learned.

Oh, I was also a bad bander and ate out 4x this weekend... But I accounted for all of it with MFP.

Friday--3/4 of a bacon cheeseburger from 5 Guys
Saturday--chips and salsa and enchilada soup from Chilis for lunch. Dinner was vegan white bean soup and some cheesy pretzel bread.
Sunday--grande Caramel Macchiato with soy from starbucks followed by broccoli cheese soup and baguette from Panera (and there may have also been a chocolate croissant and a toffee nut cookie consumed, also).

At least I said no to the cheesesteak dinner and instead had stir fry with brown rice pasta.

Baby steps, I know, but I could have totally just said screw it, I'm going to have a cheesesteak for dinner b/c I had blown the day.... But I didn't. And by making a healthier dinner choice, I only went over calories by 30.... Instead of 800. That is something I'm very proud of.

So happy Monday. Get back on that horse that you fell off of this weekend, tighten the reins, and start heading toward your goal. I'm going to be riding right along with you.

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

Weigh-in Monday

Weighing in yesterday, I was really discouraged. When the scale read 347.2, i was really really discouraged.

Then I realized that my starting weight was 354.0, and not 344.0. So instead of gaining 3.2 lbs, I lost 6.8.

So yeah, that was kind of awesome. I know that part of it was water weight from my period, but I'm very happy that I got the scale to move down.

Now to continue the trend.

Saturday, March 21, 2015

MFP... Why did I wait so long?

In order to get back on track and break past the weightgain plateau I hit, I decided to go back to basic basics.

When I first started this journey, I was required to complete six months of education and nutrition classes. As part of the process, a nutritionist put everyone on a meal plan with daily calories to help with presurgical weightloss. My calorie total to stay under in October 2012 was 2000, and before surgery, I lost 40lbs from walking and following this plan.

Monday, I decided to start tracking my calories again. I exercise a lot, but I've been gaining weight. When I went to get out my trusty pen and pad, I couldn't find one.  Enter My Fitness Pal.

MFP told me that to lose 1lb per week, that I needed to eat less than 2460 calories. I thought I would die, because that surely couldn't be right. That number is way too high.

I lowered my number to 2000 to start, and I've done pretty good this week. I love that it tracks my exercise, also. I went over a little a few days, but not by much and not every day. I indulged last night in two slices of pizza, which ate up almost 800 calories of my day, but I accounted for it. If I bite it, I write it...er, enter it into the app, that is. It's been a struggle this week with my Aunt Flow visiting, so next week should be easier.

My favorite part that keeps me motivated the most is at the end of the day when you finish everything, it tells you, "If every day was like today, you will weigh _____ in five weeks".

I weighed myself last Monday morning to see where I was starting. You can see the starting weight listed on my ticker... 354. I am disappointed in myself for back sliding the way I have, but I'm going to work hard to be better. I plan to weigh every Monday for accountability.

My goal I'd like to meet is to lose 20 lbs by September. It will be difficult because once baseball season starts, my gym visits will be less frequent due to living in the city and the lack of parking. I just need to motivate myself to do more walking and elliptical.

So I'm starting over. It isn't the first time. I'm sure it won't be the last. The only thing that matters is that I keep trying.

Tuesday, March 17, 2015

3year anniversary

Three years ago today, my mom passed away.

Two years ago next week, I had my lap band surgery.

One year ago, I was struggling with a weight loss plateau.

Today, I'm still plateaued, but I went to the gym and had my ass kicked by one of the personal trainers who taught a cardio toning class instead of zumba. I got a hug from a gust of wind that slammed my car door shut, and reminded me that my mom is always with me. I had a milkshake and onion rings for dinner, because that was one of my mom's favorite meals.

I had a pretty good day today.

Sunday, March 15, 2015

Starting again

I'm starting over tomorrow, with the help of my Facebook bander group. Going to do the best I can to stick with cutting out sugar and stick with high protein.

I'm debating about doing the preop diet that I did before surgery. I hit ketosis and lost 16lbs in two weeks. I just need to do a little prep and pick up some things this week to make it work. Fresh veggies, string cheese, sf jello and sf pudding. I already have plain Greek yogurt, eggs, and plenty of protein powder on hand.

I think this can work. I hope this can work. I know this can work. I have to make it work. I'm failing my band. I'm afraid to get on the scale but I need to do that so I can see how far I've got to make up for.